The story is sadly familiar: a rich, famous and powerful husband cheats on his undeniably gorgeous wife, apologizes and wants a second chance.
In the case of Tiger Woods, the reason for his “transgressions” may stem more from the fact that his own life is missing something than from problems with his wife, experts say.
“People who have affairs typically do so because something is lacking,” says psychotherapist Stacy Kaiser. “You can be the world’s best golfer, role model and endorsement spokesman and still not feel good inside.”
When that happens, she says, a man tends to “fill that hole with women as a distraction and an escape.”
Unfortunately, some individuals who’ve mastered sports and the art of making money still haven’t managed to master a relationship filled with respect and trust, Kaiser says.
“These men don’t have good coping skills,” she explains. “So when things are rough at home, they go outside the home rather than trying to fix things.
“And the message they send is: I’m putting my energy into someone else’s home and into some other woman.”
Men may also cheat in the belief that it will simplify their lives, Kaiser says. Every marriage, no matter how perfect, has its rough patches and its moments when both spouses are grumpy, nagging or tired.
“A man decides he wants to be with someone who is not yelling at the kids, who he can just watch TV and have sex with,” Kaiser says.
“They are reaching out for someone who keeps it carefree and light all the time. Of course, the normal marriage is not carefree all the time.”
She points out, too, that Tiger Woods had “a rough childhood.”
“His father put pressure on him and this can make someone grow up doubting themselves,” Kaiser says. “A temporary way to fix this is to have extra women around.”
Men who cheat on their wives – and at least 30 percent do, according to psychologist Karen Sherman – do so out of boredom.
“By having affairs, a man like Tiger Woods feels constantly adored and made to feel that he is significant,” she says. “Powerful men tend to be on a power trip.”
When rich and accomplished men get a lot of attention from women, it becomes a mark of status, says psychotherapist Sheenah Hankin. They wind up craving it and wanting to be the center of attention.
“You and I both know that spouses won’t get that kind of attention when they are involved longterm with someone and have children,” she says. “But someone like Tiger Woods will just go out and get the attention in the arms of some adoring fan. Instead of responsibility, there is sex and being told by the woman that he is the most marvelous man she’s ever been with.”
Often cheating has less to do with sex and more to do with “being wanted,” explains psychologist Paul Schienberg, author of “You Can’t Afford to Break Up.” And there’s a little element of danger, too.
“Men like Tiger Woods have a large ego and they need a high level of excitement,” Schienberg says. “Even if it risks his whole image, he needs that adrenaline rush and he is willing to risk it all. There’s definitely another Tiger Woods inside the Tiger Woods who we see.”
& Of Course
Take your name off your phone LOL